The last Thursday Thirteen of 2005…
1. I fulfilled a long standing desire to see Robert Plant in person on stage!
2. And Tom Petty!
3. And Doug E Fresh!
4. And Dr. John!
5. And i also got to see John Fogerty again, this time with John Mellencamp!!
6. Harry Potter and The Half-Blood Prince, and Charlaine Harris’s “Dead” series
7. Paris, even in February!
8. Any year THREE Johnny Depp movies are playing in the theaters is a good year! (Finding Neverland, Charlie & the Chocolate Factory, The Libertine)
9. My iPod, Tivo & camera phone!
10. Losing 30 pounds (course I haven’t lost any more, but the good news is I also haven’t gained any back (and I just weighed myself to check!)
11. Discovering the Thursday Thirteens!
12. ME coming to visit in January and again in Feb, cruising with her (and the free side trip to Epcot) in May for our annual vacation AND getting to see her in NYC in Oct!
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This was my original idea for the Thursday Thirteen today…don’t read if you’re in the least sad or don’t want to feel sad or for various other reasons. I’m not looking for sympathy or anything like that, it’s just how I feel and I wanted to write it down and get it out.
(and the guilt I feel about my Mom)
1. I’m quite sure I let my mother down in any number of ways.
2. Not the least was failing to make her a grandmother, which she wanted so very badly.
3. We didn’t get along very well, especially when I turned 12 years old and from then on.
4. I’m not a very nice daughter (or person for that matter); I”m selfish & heartless & inconsiderate & impatient.
5. She really wanted to know where I stayed when I ran away from home at 14; I never told her.
6. I didn’t visit her as frequently as I should’ve/could’ve at the nursing home.
7. When she passed, I wasn’t there and I wish I had been. I was there 2 hours before.
8. I think that she didn’t like me very much as a person, but loved me as her daughter.
9. The day I got married we had a fight because I felt she was drinking too much and she’d embarrass me.
10. Her favorite cookies were snickerdoodles; I kept saying, I’ll make those for her, and then…she passed.
11. Our biggest fight involved two cats of mine (Jasiah & Smoky) that were staying at my parents home when I was living with my friend Sue & her son Joel. Mom got sick of hearing me say I was going to take them soon (I was waiting for the apartment complext to put screens in the windows so the cats couldn’t jump out). Without telling me, she brought them to the humane society. The next day I stopped by the house to pick up the cats and found them gone. When I found out what happened…well, to say I was beyond mad would be an understatement. In later years, she always asked my friends if I’d forgiven her for that.
12. I never felt really close to her.
13. In my heart, I know I could’ve done more for her.